The new Alabama Law on abortion has given me fruit for thought. Statistics show some 206,000 abortions have been performed in England and Wales for residents and some 5,000 for non-residents and yes they are free for residents on the National Health Service. I must add 64,445 were repeat abortions.
Let’s put this in perspective, there were approximately 679,000 live births in England and Wales, which means approximately 22% of all pregnancies currently end in abortion.
What are the laws in the UK, well elective abortion is not legal. Before an abortion can take place two doctors need to confirm that the pregnancy is a threat to the life or health of the mother or her children. Therefore a medical reason is required for every abortion.
What actually happens, if the continuing pregnancy threatens the mental or physical health of the mother she can elect to terminate and it will be granted.
Am I for or am I against? Well I can honestly say I am both, I’m not trying to sit on the fence but I have my views.
Abortion due to rape and incest cannot be argued against. The right for a woman to choose whether to keep this child or not, a constant reminder of her horrifying experience is a right. For those who choose to keep the child then I am in awe of you.
The UK allows abortion up to 24 weeks. This I find difficult to swallow. A 24 weeks foetus is a baby. Babies born due to premature labour have survived and continue to grow outside of the womb. How can you say this is right? A very small percentage of women are oblivious to being pregnant at early stage.
I cannot in all honestly agree that an abortion at such a late stage should be permitted. These babies, have grown they are formed. The procedure alone must be horrifying.
I agree that women should have the right to choose but I think the number of weeks should be a maximum of 12 weeks. Yes the foetus has already formed at 12 weeks, all the organs, muscles, limbs and bones are in place, and the sex organs are well developed. All that is left is for the foetus to mature. So could we argue even 12 weeks is too long? I think there needs to be a cut of point and in my mind 12 weeks gives a mother time to know she is pregnant and time to make that decision.
I am all for the abortion pill and this can only be taken up to 8 weeks. This in my humble opinion is the preference. Yes the foetus is forming but the abortion pill causes your uterus to cramp and shed its inner lining and contents. I am not trying to justify that this is better but it is not a baby that has been fully formed. It is almost like severe period pains and clotting being dispelled. The pain alone should serve as a lesson to be more responsible.
If you think 64,000 women have had repeat abortions, have they learnt nothing? It is far too easy in this country to obtain an abortion and stricter guidelines should be put in place to stop this travesty of repeat offenders and yes I am using the word offenders.
I remember a girl at university in three years had 5 abortions, how can this be right. How can this be legal? We have every contraceptive on the market offered free in this country. You do not even need to go to your doctors; there are a number of free clinics that will provide you with contraceptives.
It happens once, you can be given. It happens twice, that is bad luck. Thereafter you have no excuses. Abortions are offered far too readily and far too easily.
I am one voice but every voice counts.
Why would you go on a show and air your dirty laundry in public? Why would you tell the world your innermost secrets, the shame that plagues your life?
Most of us wouldn’t, it’s as simple as that. Have you noticed the type of people that are attracted to these shows and how do they get on these shows in the first place.
The producers seek them out and through a careful vetting process, they decide who will go on and who will be rejected. Who do they choose? The inarticulate, the downtrodden, the haters, the people that we will love to hate. This is reality TV, they leave them naked on stage for the world to see.
These shows deliberately choose the weak, the helpless and the vulnerable. The people that want their 5 mins of fame, what these people do not realise after their stint on TV they have to face the outside world to be ridiculed and spat upon.
The mother who threw her 15 year old out because she slept with mum’s boyfriend. What did this mother expect? Did she think that the people would be on her side? She is a mother, behave as a mother and take your child aside and say ‘my darling talk to me and I will try and understand’ what did she expect, respect for throwing her teen out. She kept the boyfriend.
It’s crazy that these types of people think they are right. The question you need to ask is who told them they were right before they came on the show. The same could be said for the X Factor, the good singers and the terrible singers. They are vetted and of course if all the singers were great, there would be no show. We all love the contestants to make a fool of themselves, it makes for good TV and for many of us it makes us feel better about ourselves.
The person who committed suicide after filming one of these shows was clearly vulnerable but the Jeremy Kyle show did not care, they want ratings so they can continue making such shows. The man that committed suicide after Love Island. When do we say enough is enough.
Danniella Westbrook said that the Jeremy Kyle show was great for her and the therapist really helped her. Please people, she was an actress, she wants to be back on TV and lets me honest she is thick skinned because she is an actress. What did they think get a semi celeb to say how wonderful their show is and we will all agree?
Yes they provide therapy for these people but we need to ask for how long? The therapist isn’t going to be with them 24/7, so when they leave the show, how are they being protected? And whatever therapy is given, it is only to them, what about the people that now hate them?
Who is to blame? We are also to blame, the people that watch, we should be ashamed. We call ourselves educated and developed, really!!! Are we really on top of the food chain? Animals kill to feed themselves, to live. We kill for sensationalism. We are worse form animals. I am ashamed to be called human. We throw these people into a gladiator pit and we watch the carnage that takes place and we developed and educated people sit back, smile and laugh at the pain and suffering before us.
We are a sadistic species; we enjoy the destruction of others. Why are we like this? Are our lives so boring that we need to see what other people are doing? Most of us are not interested in the good that people do, no, we are interested in their dark sides, that makes for good reality TV.
So what does that say about us as a species?
The Jeremy Kyle show has been suspended but that is not good enough it should be axed. Do we need to wait for another death to realise that reality TV is bad for our health.
Have you ever just felt lonely, even when you are with a crowd of people? I found myself feeling like that all the time. I talked to friends every day, yet I felt alone and in a sense, isolated. Strange, that the feeling of isolation can be so overwhelming.
I felt a loss but a loss I could not explain. I am contented but simply feeling contented did not feel enough. Was I being greedy? Wanting more? Am I entitled to more?
I needed to find whatever is missing to fill this emptiness.
I recognised that there was a problem but couldn’t pin point the reason. Is it lack of money, not being in a relationship or not having enough success? No, feeling empty is about what I felt inside, it was my internal feelings not what was going on around me. I think it is how I compared myself to others; it was my insecurities that made me feel like this. I felt tired and bored all the time and felt a knot in my stomach that I couldn’t get rid of. I knew something was wrong but just couldn’t shake it off.
Maybe I simply felt unfulfilled. I was not where I had hoped to be. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel but just couldn’t reach it. So many good things were happening in my life, good friends, opportunities and a possible bright future but something was holding me back. If I could rid myself of this darkness that was holding me back and finally reach the light then I knew this emptiness would dissipate. Unfortunately, I was finding it hard. I guess it’s about discovering what the darkness is? Why could I not be free of it? What is in that darkness that has such a strong hold on me?
Is it easier in life to remain where we are? Have we set our goals to high, hence we can never reach the light? When we feel like this, we need to leave our ambitions aside for the moment and concentrate on what makes us happy. We need to have a new outlook on life.
I didn’t feel depressed or at least I didn’t think I was depressed. I think I needed to fill the void. I spent so much time at home and just couldn’t seem to leave the house. I had so many interests and had simply let them go. I stopped attending classes and have surrounded myself with four walls and clearly had isolated myself.
I have a purpose; I have relationships with friends, so I know it is not a lack of purpose or friends. Maybe I needed hobbies, somewhere to go to, a couple of days a week. Renew my interests and forget for a few hours about work and children. Forget about the battle I seem to face day in and day out.
I have read that the feeling of emptiness can be caused by:
The only ones I can identify with are 3 and 4. Am I fooling myself? I don’t think so or at the very least I don’t believe so.
Buddhism teaches us that renouncing ego and desire can achieve openness, inner peace, receptivity, and ultimate enlightenment. Indeed Christianity, Islam and Judaism all teach the same concept to dissipate this feeling of emptiness. Am I religious, no not really? I believe in God and I believe all my actions have consequences. I am after something different. I believe I need spiritual and not religious guidance per se. I know they can walk hand in hand but I don’t need someone reading out verses of scripture to me. I need more than this.
This may not be for all but for me at the moment, I believe this may help. Well at least it could be a starting point. I need to learn about my inner feelings and recognise early on when I’m feeling this void before it takes hold and I find myself depressed.
It is interesting that many people say that the feeling of emptiness is due to lack of love or attention in childhood. I don’t believe this is entirely true. I think our lives can change so suddenly from a high to a low that our brains have had no time to adjust. A steady decline is easier to cope with than an immediate drop.
The key is to establish what you think you are missing. Write it down, write what makes you happy, contended or indeed what you have now. Then write down what is missing, even what you desire. Don’t think just write. This little exercise will help you recognise what this void is all about. Then what? Good question!!!
Take a warm bath: Many researchers have shown that bathing has a lot of benefits including pain relief, enhanced mobility and improves psychological well-being. It may give you the space you require to reflect what you see on that piece of paper.
Appreciate what you have and not what you don’t have: research shows that feeling grateful are important, it makes you positive and this positivity will help you feel less empty. Being thankful will make you more satisfied and less stressed.
Explore new things: Change your environment, add to your knowledge every day. Research shows, even little things as changing lighting or moving furniture, the temperature in your room can have a positive effect on your emotional state.
I also think it is more than the above; it is discovering who you are first. Know what makes you who you are. Once you can establish this you become strong and that strength will push you to resolve this feeling of emptiness. Ask friends ‘have I changed?’ The people around you will recognise the changes before you do. If friends and family can tell you first, you can avoid that emptiness leading to depression.
I understand that many feel this at some point in their lives and I think that maybe, just maybe I need spiritual guidance. I need a sense of who I am, find the inner peace with who I am and my circumstances. That is not to say that I accept my circumstances but spiritual guidance can give me a fresh outlook. A feeling of being protected and a feeling of enlightenment. I feel I am ready for this.
I realise, purpose is important but having purpose, may not dissipate this feeling. It helps us strive to want more but that type of ‘MORE’ may not fill the void. I realised that I needed a different kind of ‘MORE’ a more spiritual outlook and hopefully I will realise inner peace that will make me even stronger. Stronger to tackle the hurdles of life, stronger to reach my goals and stronger to choose who I wish to be.